How to Create a Marriage Mission Statement
You can download The Marriage Mission Satement Workbook at the end of this article.
In 1989, Stephen R. Covey wrote The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, a book that transformed the way we approach our lives, our goals, and our sense of purpose. In his second habit, Covey introduced the idea of creating a personal mission statement—a guiding principle to help us live with intention. These mission statements encourage us to “begin with the end in mind,” asking us to envision where we want to be in twenty, thirty, forty, or even fifty years.
As I reflect on this concept, I see how closely it aligns with biblical principles. Proverbs 29:18 reminds us: “Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.”
In this verse, the word “vision” refers to the revelation and guidance found in God’s Word. Without it—without a clear understanding of His truth and direction for our lives—we falter. We lose our way. But with His Word as our foundation, we find purpose, direction, and joy.
Covey’s idea of creating a mission statement and Proverbs 29:18 both point to the importance of living intentionally and with clarity. While Covey focuses on personal and professional growth, the Bible calls us to align our vision with God’s eternal purpose. This concept doesn’t just apply to individuals; it also applies to our relationships, especially marriage.
There are so many “voices” fighting for our attention today. We live in an Information Age where everyone seems to have an opinion on how we should live, what we should prioritize, and even what our purpose should be. It’s overwhelming, isn’t it? With so much noise, it can be hard to discern the truth.
When Steven and I got married, we were eager to create a strong, lasting, and meaningful relationship. We turned to books, articles, and advice from countless experts. We read everything we could get our hands on—guides to a “perfect marriage,” advice for building a “successful partnership,” and countless lists of what we “should” do to thrive as a couple.
But do you know what we discovered? Every single one of those marriage books paled in comparison to the Word of God.
We were searching for the secret to a successful marriage, but the answer had been right in front of us all along. The Word of God wasn’t just one of many resources; it was the resource—the foundation we needed. So, we made a choice: we put away the self-help books and turned fully to the Word.
With God’s Word in hand, we set out to create a marriage mission statement—not based on what we desired or what a trendy blog or Pinterest board suggested, but on what He desires for our marriage. Far too often, we find ourselves turning to Amazon Prime or Pinterest for answers before turning to the Word of God. But we knew that if our marriage was going to thrive, it had to be built on His vision, not the world’s.
Our crafted mission statement has become a source of life and direction for our marriage. Whenever we lose focus, we go back to the mission statement. When we’re tempted to compare ourselves to “that couple in church” or model our lives after someone else, we go back to the mission statement. When we see something or someone we admire, we measure it against the mission statement. If it doesn’t align with God’s vision for our marriage, we let it go.
It’s that simple.
Our mission statement has been a compass, keeping us grounded and reminding us of the purpose God has for our relationship. It’s not about trying to look like someone else or following a formula for success—it’s about following Him.
In this article, we’re sharing the steps Steven and I used to create a God-designed marriage mission statement. Our hope is that these tips will inspire you and your spouse to focus your marriage on the Word of God and align it with His desires for your relationship.
STEP 1: Pray.
This might seem obvious, but it’s the most essential step. How can we know the voice of God if we don’t talk to Him? Begin the process by taking time to pray—both individually and together. Quiet your hearts and minds, and ask the Lord to guide you. Pray for clarity, unity, and a vision for your marriage that honors Him.
Ask God to stir your hearts to create a marriage that reflects His love and truth. Prayer isn’t just a starting point; it’s the foundation upon which everything else is built.
STEP 2: Set Aside Time.
Once you’ve prayed, set aside intentional, uninterrupted time to focus on creating your mission statement. In a world full of distractions, this step is crucial.
Steven and I chose a Friday night at a coffee shop to do this. We made it a date night—dressed up, ordered our favorite drinks, and set aside time to dream and plan together. It wasn’t just a task; it became a meaningful experience we both cherish.
Find a time and space that works for you and your spouse, whether it’s a cozy spot at home or a special outing. Make it intentional and meaningful.
STEP 3: Be Honest. Be Vulnerable.
Let’s face it—vulnerability is hard. We all want to put our best foot forward, even with the person we love most. But when you’re crafting something as significant as a marriage mission statement, it’s vital to lay it all on the table.
Be honest about your hopes, fears, and desires for your marriage. Share the dreams God has placed on your heart, and be open about the areas where you feel you both can grow. Transparency allows God to work in the spaces we might otherwise try to hide.
Remember, vulnerability isn’t about weakness—it’s about trust. Trust in God, trust in your spouse, and trust in the process. Let Him take your honesty and create something beautiful through it.
STEP 4: Read the Word together.
We decided to start with the Word of God. So together, we read these verses and asked two questions for each verse. We both had to answer. We then discussed ways that we want to incorporate these verses into our marriage, and how they can help direct us to be what God wants us to be.
a. Proverbs 29:18
1. What do we want our marriage to look like when we are 80 years old?
2. How does the Word of God guide our marriage?
b. Joshua 24:14-15
1. We both come from different backgrounds, how do we serve the Lord in our marriage?
2. By serving the Lord in our marriage, how will it effect our entire home?
c. Psalm 127:1
1. What does this verse mean for our marriage?
2. Have we let the Lord build our relationship? If so, how can we continue? If not, how can we let go of the reigns and let Him take the lead?
d. 1 Corinthians 13
1. Why did the Lord inspire these verses?
2. Which verse(s) do we struggle with personally?
STEP 5: Avoid Blame
As Steven and I worked through these questions, there were moments when we were tempted to point fingers or assign blame. Thoughts like, “You never do that,” or “I wish you would do this more,” crept into our conversations. But we quickly realized that this exercise isn’t about focusing on what we aren’t doing in our relationship. That approach isn’t biblical, nor is it helpful.
If you find yourself tempted to blame or criticize, pause and turn to Scripture—specifically, 1 Corinthians 13. This chapter reminds us of what love truly is:
• Love is patient.
• Love is kind.
• Love does not boast.
• Love does not keep track of wrongs.
Our goal in creating a marriage mission statement is to build a relationship centered on the Word of God (Proverbs 29:18). It’s not about dwelling on past mistakes or shortcomings but about looking forward with hope and unity.
Instead of pointing fingers at what your spouse isn’t doing or could do better, shift your focus:
• Focus on the positive.
• Focus on the future.
• Focus on the mission statement.
Let the process be about growth, grace, and partnership. By grounding your conversations in God’s love and truth, you’ll create a mission statement that strengthens your marriage and brings you closer together—not further apart.
STEP 6: Brainstorm.
After we read these Scriptures and opened discussion on our relationship, we began to ask each other questions. These questions helped to guide us, and direct us. We grabbed a piece of paper and began writing our answers; re-writing our answers; and laughing as we went along. (You can download your copy of the workbook we used at the end of this article. These questions are included.)
Our Purpose.
What is the purpose of your marriage? Is it to be social? To be mission-minded? To be full of romance? To create a large family? These are just examples, of course, but what is the purpose of your marriage? Where do you want to be at 80 years old together?
What are your dreams?
Our Beliefs.
1. What principles or beliefs guide our marriage/relationship and ultimately will help you to accomplish your dreams together? What are your values?
2. Centered on Biblical examples, what role do you play as a husband in this marriage?
3. Centered on Biblical examples, role do you play as a wife in this marriage?
4. What role does God to play in your marriage?
5. If you have kids or are thinking of having children, what values do you hope your marriage emulates to your kids?
Our Strengths.
Answer this question separately and then come together to share your answers.
1. What are your unique and personal strengths? What do you bring to the table?
2. What are your spouses unique and personal strengths? What does he bring to the table?
3. What are the strengths of you together as a couple?
Our Goals.
What goals do you want to accomplish in life together? Maybe you want to go on a big vacation every year, or serve in your church together, or start a non-profit, or just be a good example to your children.
Most Important
What three things are the most important to you in this marriage? It can be something like trust or honesty, romance or passion, communication or parenting.
STEP 6: Create your Mission Statement.
Take your answers from the five questions above and draft your mission statement. Keep it simple. The importance here is that your mission statement is something that can be easily understood and contains both of your input. Feel free to draft your own statement using the template in the downloadable workbook at the end of this article. This was our template but feel free to add or remove anything that doesn’t fit in with the vision God gave you for your marriage.
Your Mission Statement may read like this . . .
We, ___________ and ____________, commit to serve the Lord in our marriage by (list your purpose from Question 1.) We believe that these beliefs will help us to accomplish the purpose the Lord placed in our hearts. ______________________ (list your beliefs from Question 2.)
We understand that God gave us different roles to play in our marriage, and each of our individual strengths serve to create a strong marriage. HUSBAND brings __________. (List the strengths of your husband) WIFE brings __________. (List the strengths of your wife) The Lord is the third strand in this marriage, and He is our _______________________. (List the role that Christ has in your marriage). Together, HUSBAND, WIFE, and the Lord we ______________. (List your strengths as a couple with the Lord as your center.)
As we walk this life together, we hope to accomplish ______________. (List the goals you established in question 4.)
With __________, ___________, and ___________ we desire to create a marriage that glorifies the Lord. (List three important factors from Question 5)
Our complete mission statement. It reflects who we are, where we are going, and who we desire to be as a couple.
STEP 7: Write it Out and Make it visible.
Now that you have your mission statement, print it out and hang it up where you can see it daily.
STEP 8: Revise as Needed.
Life changes and the things that matter most to you today may not matter as much ten years down the road. Revise this mission statement as needed. If you accomplish a major goal of this mission statement, or if you want to add something more to your mission, start at Step 1 and revise as needed.
STEP 9: Pray.
Pray over your mission statement. The enemy wants nothing more than to attack our marriages. So pray that the Lord would be a banner over your relationship and your home. Keep your marriage at the forefront of your prayer life.
STEP 10: Take it further.
Now that you’ve established your overall mission statement, think of specific things that you want to accomplish as a couple. Specifically, what do you want to accomplish in your . . .
Spiritual Life. What do you want your relationship with God to look like as a couple?
Family Life. What do you want to see accomplished in your home life? Children? Family? Siblings? In-Laws?
Physical Life. How are you going to maintain your health together individually and as a couple?
Financial Life. What is important to you in terms of saving, tithing, and becoming debt free? What does your financial life look like and where is it going?
Social Life. How are you going to maintain and develop friendships as a couple?
Work Life. What does your career look like? Is is where you want to be? How will you manage work and family life?
Recreational Life. What is important to you as a couple in terms of down-time, vacations, and hobbies or activities?
The Symphony of Praise FREE downloadable workbook has over 25 pages for you and your spouse to work through as you develop your Marriage Mission Statement.
Steven and I had an amazing time creating our Marriage Mission Statement. It not only gave us a great date-night, but also helped us to hear each other’s hearts. I found out things about him that I didn’t know and he found out things about me.
It goes back to Proverbs 29:18. What is the vision for your marriage? What does God say about your marriage? And how are you going to accomplish His vision for you both?
I pray that this article has helped you to create a marriage mission statement with your spouse. We would love to hear about your date-night in the comments below. Share your mission statement with us!
